Ep 76: Eating to Cope with Roe
07/13/22 | 9:02 | Episode 76
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When we feel bad, we think that eating will make us feel better, when in fact it usually works to exacerbate our crappy feelings.
Think about it, you feel stressed and upset so you head to the kitchen for a “snack” which ends up being half the plate of brownies. Or, maybe you grab something healthy like nuts and fruit but you end up overdoing it.
The problem here isn’t food. It's that we haven’t made the effort to diagnose the REAL problem.
And the problem, in this case, is that our reproductive rights are taken away.
The problem is NOT our feelings about it.
But when our brains think the problem is the shitty feelings we seek a quick, cheap dopamine hit in the form of food.
It is plain to see that food will not solve the problem of the overturning of Roe, and yet we eat anyway because our primal brain is in charge in these circumstances.
But the good news is that we are not driven solely by our primal brain. We have a prefrontal cortex, or what I sometimes call our evolved or higher brain, that has the capacity for judgment, rationalization, and planning.
So when it comes to something upsetting like asinine Supreme Court decisions, we want to shut our primitive brain down and instead lead with our evolved brain– the one that knows that chocolate doesn’t give women their rights back.
Identifying what the real problem is– a bad Supreme Court decision, an unsatisfying job, and unhappy marriage, a life unintentionally live– allows you to stop avoiding and start doing something about it.
When you stop using food to solve a problem, your whole life changes– for the better.
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Transcript
If you're like me, the overturning of Roe V. Wade has left you feeling a lot of intense, shitty emotions.
For many, emotions like these can lead us to one place— and no, I'm not talking about a demonstration— I'm talking about the pantry.
If you’ve found yourself eating to feel better, first– you are not alone. Second, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you.
It is 100% normal to seek comfort in the form of yummy foods like chocolate, Mac n cheese, or chips. Truth is, you're hardwired to seek pleasure, especially when you're feeling shitty or stressed.
When we feel powerless, or fearful, or anxious, or any other uncomfortable emotion, we are hardwired to move away from that discomfort and toward pleasure. In other words, we are hardwired to feel better.
The result we want from eating is to feel better.
But the hard truth is, we don’t.
We think that eating will make us feel better– comforted, pleasured, empowered– when in fact it usually works to exacerbate our crappy feelings.
Think about it, you feel stressed and upset so you head to the kitchen for a “snack” which ends up being half the plate of brownies. Or, maybe you grab something healthy like nuts and fruit but you end up overdoing it.
The problem here isn’t food.
It isn’t that the brownies are so tempting or that we lack self-control.
The problem is that we haven’t made the effort to diagnose the REAL problem.
And the problem, in this case, is that our reproductive rights are taken away, which will lead to an overwhelming cascade of other problems for women and other folks with the capacity for pregnancy.
The problem is NOT our feelings about it.
But you see what’s happening here, right?
Our brains think the problem is the shitty feelings– we must change the shitty feelings!!
And what’s the fastest way to do that? By getting a quick, cheap dopamine hit and for people like us that comes in the form of food. Bring on the fettuccine alfredo, red wine, and tiramisu my friends!
We think, for a moment, that the food solves the problem because for that moment it does!! We feel better while we are eating… but then the problem, the REAL problem, remains… forced childbirth is still a thing– resulting in diminished educational access, lower earning potential, and prolonged mental health issues.
It is plain to see that food will not solve the problem of the overturning of Roe, and yet we eat anyway because our primal brain is in charge in these circumstances.
But the good news is that we are not driven solely by our primal brain. We have a prefrontal cortex, or what I sometimes call our evolved or higher brain, that has the capacity for judgment, rationalization, and planning.
It is with this part of our brain that we want to make as many decisions as possible because our primitive brain– while wildly useful when it comes to keeping us alive by activating fight or flight when there is real threat to our survival– isn’t cut out for the job in our modern world.
Our evolved brain has the capacity for planning, which requires visualizing into the future and imagining what we want. It is responsible for goal-setting and taking action toward those goals. It is the reason you graduated from college or have a healthy savings account– it has the capacity to make rational, longview decisions that set you up for success.
So when it comes to something upsetting like asinine Supreme Court decisions, we want to shut our primitive brain down (the one that is convinced a “Share Size” bag of M&Ms is a great idea) and instead lead with our evolved brain– the one that knows that chocolate doesn’t give women their rights back.
Now ask yourself: if I were using my evolved brain, how would I solve this problem?
For me that looks like
Educating myself by listening to experts on radio shows and podcasts, and reading as much as I can on the topic
Going to demonstrations to show my support
Donating to campaigns such as Mandela Barnes
Dialoguing with people who are ambivalent about the decision
While none of these feels like it moves the needle enough, at least I can say my actions are aligned with an actual solution to the REAL problem, instead of plopping down in front of my TV wi with popcorn and wine to binge on RHWOBH (I’m going to do that anyway, because it’s my jam– but I won’t overeat or try to solve the problem with food).
One of my biggest transformations was realizing that eating wouldn’t solve the problem– and that emotions are not problems to solve.
Identifying what the real problem is– a bad Supreme Court decision, an unsatisfying job, and unhappy marriage, a life unintentionally live– allows you to stop avoiding and start doing something about it.
When you stop using food to solve a problem, your whole life changes– for the better.
My 90 Days to Food Freedom program takes you through my 4-step method to do exactly that: diagnose the real problem, achieve food freedom, and get what you really want in your life.
To learn more about the program head over to liapineli.com and book a curiosity call with me. We will chat about what you’ve been experiencing and how I